September 28
Piles of work and a poem
1986
Mom was discharged from the hospital on Friday. Not well, just discharged. Since she’d had a treatment that morning, she was feeling moderately ok. By the evening, she was shakier, starting to feel less sure of the whole thing. Yesterday was more difficult, as her anxiety level grew. I was really worried by midday, but she didn’t seem to get very much worse after that. Today is another day. This is hard work!
It’s now Sunday night. Today she was feeling down and lethargic. The anxiety is not as evident. It may be there, but I can’t tell. It’s been five weeks, almost, and she’s about where she was it the beginning. In a way, that’s an improvement, since she’s been worse. But I am feeling puzzled, frustrated and angry at the lack of information I’m getting. Am I doing the right thing? What can I expect? How long is this going to go on? I really am confused. The stress so far is mild, but it will build as the week goes by if there is no improvement. Mom feels it, too. Thank heaven for Kiddo’s day care. At least I have her off my hands for part of the time.
1979
What characteristics of the fashionable man and woman of the late 19th century might account for their different responses to ready-to-wear clothing?
1997
It feels like autumn today: cool and gray. Rain is forecast, but I know it won’t result in a burst of growth, except for leaf mold.
I have spent the last fifteen years nurturing my children, with probably another ten to go. My physical resources are nearly gone; my body aches and creaks, my eyes strain to see, and I don’t have the stamina I once did. But they have friends with energy and stamina now, and I don’t need to be the Great Playmate.
I am waiting to see if my mind is where I left it 11 years ago. The last great work I did intellectually was the work on Dress Rehearsal. Everything since then has been pot-boilers, I know. But it’s time to return to the room of the mind and spend more time there, every day.
Deep inside, I think, “I’m safe now, no more parents left to lose.” But I know there are still people around me Whom I love as much, and whose existence is equally fragile. So I am certainly not out of the woods. This has only been a rehearsal, unfortunately.
2014
A day of back pain. I got a lot of work done, but not nearly what needed to be done. The pile seems to be growing, not shrinking, by the day. Hell's bells!
2017
Time to spend more time working through the pile on my desk. Hopefully the weather will turn fall-ish today.
2020
Traveling though Glacier Park on the Empire Builder
Pinnacle You could take a picture or you could look, instead. Fog the shade of sunrise Clouds barely resting on the treetops. The river below, pebbled with ripples Or perhaps Rippled with stones. She spreads her arms, Her cape of deepest green, lined with golden aspen leaves, Her face hidden in snow and shadows.
2023
I finished two more projects for the holiday craft fair, and consolidated the Other Thing I Am Working On into a 50-page PDF. (Not as pretty, so no photo.)
2024
Good writing week, excellent times with buddies, and two (TWO) finished projects.
