May 18
Signs of maturity, more lists
1965
The Go-Go party had a rally and block dance tonight. It was neat! The Mystics played, and they had records, too.
I went off with 6 other kids - 2 boys, 4 girls, on a crazy ride up Lover's Leap. I was scared. It was an old car and he drove fast. By the way - last year the parties were the Progressives and the Wallabies. The Progressives won.
Comment 2023
I have to love the student council elections and the party names. The winners were always the same kids who got the most desirable superlatives in the yearbook, of course. Most collegiate, best dressed, best-looking, etc.
The ride with 6 random kids out to Lover’s Leap, along unlit dirt roads, is a classic example of poor judgement in adolescents. It’s worth noting that our little town lost more kids to car accidents than we did in Vietnam.
1973
A better night, even if I did get a little sloshed. Almost called D at 2 am, but talked myself out of it. Maybe I’d adjust to Jim being gone faster than I thought…except I’d be a fat alcoholic. (But not a horny one for long!) I made a neat denim jacket, except for my tubby hips, which don’t quite fit.
Comment 2023
Nice to know that my judgement was somewhat better eight years later. Not much, but baby steps. D was a waiter at the same place I worked, who had made it known that if I ever “needed company”, he was interested. It was the 70s, and “open relationships” were in the air. And the answer is “None of your business”.
1977
History…no answers, but perspective. Also “children’s history” idea…using children’s interest in other children as a learning tool.
Later-
Spent part of the day at the library today, hiding/working/playing. It really is so enjoyable.(especially on a hot, humid day like this, when the library is air conditioned.) I had a good time watching video tapes, then decided to browse through The Futurist magazine. Hazel Henderson’s talk at URI last year has been haunting me. I feel so drawn to the idea of formulating the future yet..what is it? It’s as if there were a palpable barrier preventing me from really approaching the subject. Perhaps, in time, I will find a way. A way to what? I am not sure even what the question is, and the answer seems light years away.
The problem, to attempt to state it, is this:
Textiles and clothing play a major part of our environment and our economy
traditionally, western fashion is a complex impulse, and one we seem to need
“fashion” is, especially in terms of clothing, a form of calculated waste. Planned obsolescence.
Online the planned obsolescence of the automobile, that of clothing is considered somehow inconsequential, unavoidable or even desirable.
Not only by the general public and the industry, but by people who may be considered reformers in other areas!
There is a taboo attached to this, a silence, a wall. Man-made? Cultural? Imaginary?
These are all part of my problem in grappling with the subject. The existing literature virtually ignores clothing. Truthfully, I have found the same thing to be true in history, anthropology, sociology, etc.
That makes me sound much more well-read than I am. And that, finally, is my greatest problem. Ignorance and inexperience.
Comment 2023
Very interesting! I was finishing up my one-year contract as a lecturer and looking ahead to starting the PhD program in the same department. I was at the point of trying to figure out what my dissertation would be about, and it was still very much an open question. Ultimately, I landed on something historical and gender-related, but this entry reveals my early interest in what would eventually become “sustainable fashion”. Much, much later, I would blog about such things.
1978
How easy it’s been to forget my birthday this year! It’s benign the back of my mind, of course, but I think of tomorrow as “Friday” or “the day I take Marley to the kennel”, or “the day I’m going to lunch at Becky’s”, or “the day before we leave for vacation”. But not my birthday.
Yet I also see tomorrow as significant. It’s the beginning of my 30th year. I wonder what the thirties will be like. The last ten years have gone so fast, I’ll be forty before I know it. Yet, I am looking forward to being thirty. Imagine taking ten years to figure out what “growing up” even meant. Not to mention spending an appalling amount of time finding myself.
I’ve decided to be very, very conscientious about my journal this year. Let’s see what happens.
1979
Tomorrow I finish year 30. It’s odd; I meant to make my 30th year something special. It has been, in its own way, but not in the way I envisioned it. I can no longer be expansive and talk about people “my age” and mean early 30s. Before it was pretend, not it’s just the truth. How unglamorous.
My last exam today. Not the Last Exam. There are still various examination hurdles. But having coursework over is a marvelous feeling (if I had the time to feel it).
Comment 2023
There was a time I would have aimed to have my PhD by the time I turned thirty. My department, however, had other plans, only accepting 3 credits from my MS program and also requiring me to take four undergraduate prerequisites for some of my doctoral courses. (Two semesters of chemistry, macroeconomics, and introduction to statistics.) But I showed them; I took four courses a semester and finished all my coursework in two years. Take that, fukkers! That felt almost as good as earning my degree in three years, at 31 instead of 30. And guess what? Once it was done, no one cared, not even me.
1982
I am submitting more to the routine. It helps if I realize this is not a time to accomplish “great things”/ Little things like feeding and diapering and small chores and a bit of reading. There are big things to do, but most can wait. If anything, I am getting more small jobs done than usual. Maybe I could try for one relatively big job per day. (Ironing, vacuum a room, etc.) Money has me a bit concerned. The car is a big expense: $9000 to buy and $400/year to insure. But car prices can only go up, and we will own this car for the duration, not just for the next few years. Maybe we won’t make it to Hawaii next summer - - probably we won’t make it to Japan. Atlanta this year, we hope, for a belated anniversary trip.
Nursing is tiring, but getting more enjoyable all the time. The main thing is remembering to get the rest I need. At times she even goes 4 hours between feedings. Otherwise, I am up 2-3 times at night. Yesterday she fed 9 times. She’s stirring now. I’m also waiting for the diaper service to arrive; this week she actually ran out of diapers. (She’s been working hard at feeding and pooping.)
She’s also spending more time awake, staring around her bassinet. Still don’t show much interest in people or sounds. I have nagging doubts about her hearing, but it’s too early to tell yet. Apparently many babies don’t notice sounds in the first month. Right now it mainly means I don’t have to tip-toe around the house. She’s really marvelous and fascinating, little as she is and little as she does.
Time to make today’s list. (A short one, but I do need my lists!)
Comment 2023
Didn’t make it to Hawaii for the Association of College Professors of Textiles and Clothing conference. Didn’t make it to Japan, either. Still haven’t been to either place. We bought an Apple IIe instead. We kept that car for sixteen years!
2019
Set up patio, yard and deck
Write check for Rich
Finish entries in Zotero
30 minutes of costumes, starting in 1956
(Added on 5/21) And that’s how busy I was!! No journaling for two days. But the party was fun, the weather cooperated, and Rich was perfect. Monday I caught up with somethings but skipped my weekly review. Now for International Communications planning and two nice un-humid days in the yard.
Comment 2023
Now I remember that paper I was working on! “Dress-Up Play: From Homemade to Store-bought”. An unpublished masterpiece!
2023
Working a day ahead and saving the drafts because May 19 is my birthday and there will be lots of layers on that cake!
2024
I am nearly finished transcribing all my journals. I still wonder what to do with this project.
Gotta ask...what was the make model of that 16 year car? Cheers!
Or someone willing to do the research and write for a general audience?? There was a time I would have loved to take this kind of subject on and do it with you. It is so needed.