June 9

So much writing, so much coffee, and a playlist

1977

I am still trying to come up with the written report about Riis. It’s tough; there’s so much to deal with. Tonight in class I do the oral report.

1978

Just watched “GiGi” in tv. I remember how it filled me with anticipation of womanhood, when I saw it as a girl. Some of it is crap, but the rest of it is…bon bons.

It was a lovely day today. I wish I had enjoyed it more, but work kept me inside.

1980

It continues to be a very wet spring. We’ve had two horrendous downpours since I planted last week. I’m not sure what is still there. I’m plugging away at the dissertation, getting enough done. I’m somewhat behind, but I think my schedule was too rigid and unrealistic. I’ll probably finish a few days late, whatever that means.

I sent a letter off to Bob…a rather maudlin and critical letter, I’m afraid. I just suddenly felt a deep need to communicate.

So far it’s a good summer. I’m looking forwards to our trip this weekend with D and W. I need a longer break and 3 days should be just about right.

I’m usually disappointed when I look back at these entries. All this weather and bookkeeping! I really do have serious ideas. I just think them and forget them. Most of them are just exercises. I must be off to campus soon… as soon as I finish my tea.

1981

{Current measurements: waist no change, Hips +, Thighs -, upper arm -}

Sunday we played tennis, or should I say we played “tennis”. We just volleyed and practiced our serves. All afternoon I worked in my garden plots, front and back. They look so neat and trim! I mulched and weeded and sweated a lot. This morning, after a struggle to wake up and get up, I went out and pulled up all the poison ivy I could find. First, of course, I armored myself well. Still, it is amazing how itchy one can get just thinking about poison ivy. The yard work is tedious, but satisfying. I almost feel like I am claiming the yard for ours. In the time we’ve lived here, I have really come to like this little house and yard and garden. Now if only Jack and Leda would sell. It’s time to take a shower and move out. So much for lazy Monday mornings.

1984

It’s been hot and awful for several days now. August is still two months away, but the weather is here already.

Mom has been shrinking into her shell more and more lately. I think it’s the weather and the uncertainty. It’s so hard to be patient sometimes, and I feel bad when I snap at her.

Work with Kiddo at home continues to be easier. Part of it may be my changing expectations. I have adapted all my old habits to her. My flexibility amazes me.

1988

I thought I would regret the end of my sabbatical, but there is so much to look forward to. I miss the structure, the sense of time, the teaching. Today I spent 4 hours working on the conclusions chapter, ending by feeling numb and drained. Now it’s outlined. Tomorrow (tonight?) the words must come. Writing is the hardest work with the most satisfaction, when it goes well. I wish I could do it full-time and still survive financially. I wish I could write fiction (Why? When reality is so complex and so interesting.)

This fall I really want to keep on writing. Tuesday and Thursday will be my research days. Can at least one other day be stolen for writing? Wednesday afternoon, perhaps. At least I have finally broken the tyranny of being a “morning writer”. 

1997

Very funny entry today in Simple Abundance about mindfulness and cleaning the kitchen. Frankly, I find it easier to be mindful when I am alone. When I am with others, it is really hard to do anything.

Yesterday after church we all went to visit Mom at Manor Care. We even got her into a wheelchair and took her out on the patio for a while, which seemed to be very good. I am going to start to shed work this week, leaving only the #1 things.

2016

Nose still drippy. Now I am sneezing, too. Allergy pill taken. I got a good night’s sleep last night; did not even wake up to pee. Today I fill in the blanks in my essay. Tomorrow I revise and finish. 

Really.

I am getting better at limiting iPad games at breakfast. It has been hard to eliminate Candy Crush entirely, but at least I minimize my playing time by stopping when I finish my first cup of coffee. I used to watch the Today Show, and if I was not catching the bus, I could sit there for an hour. Now I have it down to 30-45 minutes. I do not think that taking that long to wake up is a sin.

Then I get my second cup of coffee and head upstairs for morning pages and work. My soundtrack for this is usually my “Thoughtful” list.

The next habit to change is my activity level. Dance more, move more, walk more, get to the pool. I almost did last Monday, until I realized I didn’t have my i.d. or my keys. So much for good intentions. I should get outside today. The Weatherguys are predicting a perfect 10/10 day, so I must take advantage.

I am not sure this article will be what Vestoj wants, but I am not sure I care. Is that terrible? I am trying to write from my heart as well as my head, and it is pulling me in a new direction.

I don’t think I have enough evidence for a piece on boy culture yet. But I have enough for some questions.

I love the song “Blue Boat Home”. A melody with sweet associations, and such beautiful new words!

Time for Tarot. The Devil: struggle against the misuse of power. Yeah, but how?

Comment 2023

That’s a lot to read, I know. So maybe I should give you a break and go easy on the comments. Here goes:

We moved out of that sweet little four-room house in 1985, and moved into our sweet little four-room apartment in 2020. It’s just right.

Writing is hard, but I love it. And morning writing is still the easiest, after two very large cups of coffee.

Here’s the Thoughtful playlist:

I Wave Bye Bye (Allen Toussaint)

Farewell Song (Artisan)

Sanctus, from Missa Luba

Lancelot’s Tune (Buskin and Batteau)

I’m So Lonesome I Could Cry (Hank Williams)

Blue Boat Home (Carey Creed)

Kind of Love You Never Recover From (Christine Lavin)

Agnus Dei (Barber; sung by the Dale Warland Singers)

Agnus Dei (Winter)