January 6, 1965
This afternoon I went in to see Mr. W. about my book report outline and V was there! I like him! He's so smart and cute and so tall and -- um, um! I like him!
I had 3 tests today: History (BAD), English (GOOD) and Biology (BAD). I've got to start paying attention!
Ah! V talked to me! I hope he likes me! If I only knew how to be popular like other girls. I WISH I DID!
January 6, 2006
I wish I had a 1964 nickel for every exclamation point in my diary. I'd be rich today.
Mr. W. was a much-feared teacher, a sarcastic wit who could be brilliant and flattering but then put you down in front of the whole class for the sake of a laugh. I heard that he later found another line of work. Good move.
I have googled V recently and he's a physician doing cell research, specializing in leukemia. When I noticed him he was a transfer student from a prep school.(Rumor had it he had been kicked out, which gave him an especially attractive bad boy image.)
It makes me cringe to think how desperate I was for love and acceptance. So much of my high school years were spent on the social margins.
January 6, 2023
I didn’t go to a high school reunion until 1997. I attended again in 2007 and 2017 (probably our last, since the powerhouse organizer in our class died in 2018). Every ten years I learned something new. At my thirtieth, I realized that almost all of my friends were Catholic. There were were, sitting at a big round table at dinner, and they were reminiscing about the nuns in elementary school. I also learned in 1997 that high school was absolutely not “the best time in our lives”, except for a few very unhappy people. In 2007, I learned that the “hoods” — the gear heads who rebuilt and raced cars — turned out to be extremely interesting people. I also learned that a few of them had crushes on me (!!!!!) but figured I was out of their league because my Dad was a newspaper editor.
At my fiftieth, I realized that I hadn’t really known any of them, even my best friend. But how could I? When you come right down to it, how could I have really known them when I was just getting to know myself? We all had secrets: fears we’d never admit, stories we wouldn’t share. The popular kids, the nerds, the bookworms, the jocks. We were all just trying to fit in, and thinking everyone else had it all figured out.
Note: As you can see, this two-layer cake has grown! I first tried this exercise in 2006 and kept it up for several months. So for a while you will hear from 1965 me, 2006 me and present me.