January 21
Today in study hall (F) I went up to get a drink of water. When I got back, Marcia passed me a note that says, "When you bent over, your dress went up in the back and Mr. B was looking at your legs. Tra-la, tra-la." she later said he was half-smiling, when when he saw her looking at him, he blushed. I wonder - oh, not a chance. He's 21 or 22 - 6 or 7 years older than me. But I can dream - which I will.
January 21, 2006
Mr. B, like Mr. V, was a student teacher from the teacher's college in Danbury. Unlike Mr.V, he was very, very cute. Short blonde hair and horn rimmed glasses. It dawns on me that at fifteen I was capable of having crushes on just about anyone.
January 21, 2023
Marcia was my very best friend in high school, and my most supportive wingperson. Whenever I needed a nudge (or a shove), Marcia was there. Without Marcia, I would never have sung in the talent show (which I finally did, junior year) or applied to study abroad or skinny-dipped in an icy creek behind her house. I probably would have done better in Physics if we hadn’t shared a bench, but so what? Just five days older than me, she was years ahead of me socially. Her friends became my friends. It was also Marcia who alerted to me wherever a boy showed any interest in me, because I was completely oblivious to the signals. She knew about my crush on V, and could keep a secret. It occurs to me now that she also never encouraged me in that direction. Maybe she knew him better than I did?
I last saw her at our 50th reunion. We made plans to meet again, but car trouble intervened and we had to make do with a phone call. We promised to try again the next summer, but she was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in November and died a month later. Sorry to end on a sad note, but the memory is still fresh enough that remembering Marcia - and yes, I am writing her real name, because she is past caring - means remembering that unkept promise, along with all the good times.
How many people could crackle in a yearbook photo?
I read this twice. Love and loss. Deeply moving.